Should I post this here?

It would be more appropriate to put this in a personal journal, but since I don't keep one (I really should), I might as well add it here.

Another birthday has come and gone (many days ago, so now I can talk about it without it being close enough to be worth thinking about except as a passing thought), and I was almost successful in getting by without notice. The company CEO did send out a happy birthday e-mail to the whole company (one day early), so I had to at least admit the day at work. Fortunately, our team took a little field trip to some of our client sites that day, so stopping for a "birthday lunch" was more of an incidental rather than a special event.

And at home, it was mostly just another day. Just a couple of cards from the wife and kids to open at dinner, and trying to ignore the phone calls from the parents calling to say happy birthday (thank goodness for answering machines, or I'm sure my mom would've tried calling all night). Fortunately, my wife hadn't decided what to get me and planned on asking me about it, so I could tell her that I didn't want anything, that it was just another day.

So why am I feeling like this? It's not something I really want to talk about, not even semi-anonymously on a random internet page. I guess a 50,000' summary would be that I'm not happy at work, and although I could change that, it wouldn't matter because I'm not happy at home either, and no amount of success at work can make up for failure in the home.

No comments: